Post 23: Friday Round-up

Sometimes I cruise through Craigslist in hopes I can find a little shred of humanity hanging out in the ads. You know, someone who just wants to help others. Well, I found the following ads, all thankfully without any photos. Let’s vote for our favorite, shall we?

Ad #1:The hoe named b sanchez –

age : 99

Anyone know a fat bitch named brittny sanchez? Stupid bitch thinks she’s white but ain’t nothing but a fat beaner thinking she fine. Screw that hoe if anyone knows her ask her how my creamed filled sausage tasted like. Peace out scum

Yeah, he sure told her in well thought-out words.

Ad #2: Some Phd in microbiology just called me crazy

Having a conversation about vaccines and this Phd from crags list calls me crazy after I tell him they have special courts for vaccine cases. He’s pro vaccine don’t you just know it?

If he’s so damn smart you would think he would know about Congressional laws passed to protect vaccine makers when their garbage they want to inject into your infant causes harm or death.

Phd big woop. All it means is someone is scholastically sharp as a whip but many times they are mentally dumb as f-ing rocks. Sometimes it’s just their petty arrogance that gets in their way all their lives but they never realize it.

Sparky has a point. No degree, obviously, but a point.

Ad #3: LOL

Do people know what LOL is???!!! Why say lol in an irrelevant context? Use it when you really feel like laughing out loudly, and stop projecting a meek, defensive, bored, inferior image!

Please tell me the relevant context. Just curious.

Ad #4: Wanted: Email Friend (Inquire Within) – m4w – 48

age : 48 status : married

I would like to hire an email friend. Pay is zero but benefits are amazing. Actually benefits are zero also. Still you get to improve your email skills (writing me emails, reading my reply, replying to my reply). Experience with writing words is required. I’m married so you being married too is preferred but not required. You can do this work from home or from your other job! Apply today.

Huh. No friends who know how to write words. What is the world coming to? Just be glad I didn’t include the anal sex rant. Vote in the comments.

20 thoughts on “Post 23: Friday Round-up

  1. #3 I’ll go one further. If I really feel like laughing out loud, I’ll laugh out loud.

    I watched a youtube video the other night. It asked about favorite words. LOL was one of them.

    Don’t cry for humanity. They will be the first ones against the wall when the revolution begins.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. #2, PHd’s on crags (sic) list, what do they know? Don’ they know that you should always get your medical advice from celebrities?
    #4 I have experience with writing words but I don’t really think I want to be your email friend so I think I’ll pass.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. As a public service, please allow me to translate these messages:

    1. Brittny Sanchez performed oral sex, then dumped me.
    2. I’m an anti-vaxer who can’t tell a special master from a special court.
    3. I’m a control freak who wants to decide when people can say “LOL.”
    4. Pornographic email pal wanted.

    Liked by 4 people

          • well noun
            a hole drilled or bored into the earth to obtain water, petroleum, natural gas, brine, or sulfur.
            a spring or natural source of water.
            an apparent reservoir or a source of human feelings, emotions, energy, etc.:
            He was a well of gentleness and courtesy.
            a container, receptacle, or reservoir for a liquid:
            the well of ink in a fountain pen.
            any sunken or deep, enclosed space, as a shaft for air or light, stairs, or an elevator, extending vertically through the floors of a building.

            a part of a weather deck between two superstructures, extending from one side of a vessel to the other.
            a compartment or enclosure around a ship’s pumps to make them easily accessible and protect them from being damaged by the cargo.

            a hollow compartment, recessed area, or depression for holding a specific item or items, as fish in the bottom of a boat or the retracted wheels of an airplane in flight.

            Liked by 2 people

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