Post 24: I am a Fine Musician

I am pleased to present this Craigslist submission from our very own Ostrimu, Piano Dan. I very carefully did not ask him why he was looking at these sorts of ads. None of my business. Nope, not even interested. I’ll ask the Llama-nun when she gets back from Phoenix.

Nude Classical/Jazz Musicians Needed

compensation: Compensation negotiable

I’m looking to hire 1-4 nude musicians to play during an art opening in [Location} from 6-8pm on March 11th. I am the curator of a show of tasteful nude photographs that reference famous nudes from the history of art, and I’m looking to hire nude musicians to play at the opening. Rate is negotiable.

A nude cellist, a nude jazz duo, a nude string quartet, two naked jazz flautists–these are all ideas of performers who would be perfect to play at our opening. Interested parties, please contact me for more details.

Do I regret the lack of photos? No, I’m pretty sure it will be in the news.

20 thoughts on “Post 24: I am a Fine Musician

  1. It’s a gallery opening, you say?
    *pushes glasses halfway down nose and adopts bored, superior attitude*
    The full frontal nudity is a comment on the way social media has exposed all of our most private secrets and made us voyeurs into one another’s lives. The naked bums represent man’s inhumanity to man.

    Liked by 6 people

  2. I’m not sure any musicians, nude or otherwise, should be playing at anybody’s opening. I certainly wouldn’t want them at mine.

    Ooh, you’ve got the corner all lovely and cosy, just how I remember it!

    Liked by 4 people

    • I am having a visual of this. It involves stirrups.
      In possibly related news: Windy, have you set up the brainbleach station in the new Snark Lounge yet?

      Liked by 1 person

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