Post 646: Bring Shovels or the Tree Gets Axed

PALM TREE FREE last chance

If this tree isn’t removed by next weekend I will cut it down. It stands between 15 and 18 feet. I don’t know its veriety. The panel wall in the photos is being removed. I don’t need help cutting it down but will entertain very REASONABLE OFFERS. I’ve listed this tree before and this is a last chance offer. Call or text ###-XX##. No habla espanol.

The last of the old palm trees planted when Father Junipero Something wandered through the Southwest and planted palm nuts. Now Sparky wants it gone. And while he would willingly cut it down, he won’t dig it out. If you want the tree to live, you must show up before next weekend and not speak Spanish. Sparky, Tree Botherer.


5 thoughts on “Post 646: Bring Shovels or the Tree Gets Axed

  1. Looks like a King Palm.
    And a good specimen, too.
    They have ridiculously small root balls, and are easy to dig up–but exceedingly dangerous when you do so, as they weigh enough to need a crane (and can smoosh things very quickly & thoroughly).

    So, when no Americun speickers answer Spark’s ad, I see a 911 call when spark fells this monster, as it’s going in the house, or out in the street, or on all the cars . . .


    Liked by 1 person

  2. Pray prithee inquistive varlot, how vouchsafe thee to which circumlocation thou claims competence?

    Google Translate does not include gibberish, blather, nor tommyrot as options for your clicking noises and ritualized gruntings.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. O ignoble tree
    Fie upon thee
    Acurst hard upon my driveway
    Thorn of soft fronds to irk my life
    I hath ransomed you in vain
    Your rescuers pleas in tongues in vain
    For I, a dunce, to explain, ignorance
    So, to headman’s axe you go
    And no trickiness any more
    Will I suffer,
    I will shut my eyes to all risk or danger
    And rely upon fairies and elven slyph
    My kingdom reclaim.
    [With chainsaw, Exeunt]

    Liked by 1 person

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