Post 853: No Longer on Speaking Terms

Wooden spoke wagon
Wooden spoke wagon can use for parts or great project to rebuild.

Grandpa Sparky: I remember coming over the Rocky Mountains in that wagon. Weren’t nothing but a tad, and my Pa and Ma almost didn’t make it. We had to eat the oxen when it snowed and they had to pull the wagon uphill both ways.

Little Sparky: Grandpa, why is the wagon in so many pieces? It’s like a puzzle or something.

GS: As we were rolling down the west side of the mountains, we were chased by wolves with dysentery. A terrible thing to see. And at the foothills waited a tribe of Lawyers, wanting to sue us for being cruel to an endangered species. Pa took a turn too sharply, and every single nail and fastener in the thing gave way. We settled with the lawyers by letting the wolves eat your Aunt Mable. Then Pa built this house right here and we kinda forgot about the wagon.

LS: What are we gonna do with it now?

GS: We gotta put in on Craig’s List and find one o’ them antique collectors who wants the pile for free. Then we’ll set up the new still right here.

LS: I can’t wait to drink that moonshine I have heard so much about.

GS: Sonny, we don’t never speak of that around here. The lawyers are still listening.

Thanks, Ralph, amazing ad that’s a little part of history. The unwritten part that isn’t often spoke of.

4 thoughts on “Post 853: No Longer on Speaking Terms

  1. Spark, there’s a special word for your collection there, specific to its condition and value.
    That word is: Kindling.

    One of the most intricate “primitive” machines in existence is the hub of a wooden spoke wheel.
    You are reducing wood to its smallest dimensions while also asking that material to perform at near its maximum capacities. While also leaving room for bearing races, bosses, and the like so the hub will actually turn–preferably in exactly the one plane, too, perpendicular to the axle. All while being concentric, too (out-of-round wheels are not a success).

    Not the sort of things one can kluudge with some popsiccle stix and glue, even hot-melt glue.

    Being a wheelwright was considered a high and necessary skill, not the sort of thing you picked up through a three minute youtube vid.

    Even today, the wooden carriage trade keeps wheelwrights on the payroll, even with all the “modern” parts available to them.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Professor, Professor!
    What?
    We need coconut palms right away!
    What?
    Yes, we need them, it’s a survival issue!
    Well, we need . . . .
    No, we got it all ready for you–here’s dome vacuum tubes, 800′ of antenna wire, some 12 volt batteries, and some elephant ear leaves, and a Volleyball! You Can Build It!

    Te Professor, sighing yet again, pressing the Thumb yet again, thinking, once again, the Betelgeuse was far too close to all these Golgafringians . . .

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s